“In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities; in the expert’s mind there are few.” Shunryū Suzuki
In Buddhism, not-knowing is an important part of our intrinsic wisdom. The same is true in Christianity. Paul, the man who wrote over half of the New Testament, said that he is content with weakness and uncertainty because when he is weak, God is strong. In Taoism, to not know lends to “a clear mind”, meaning a state of mental emptiness where one is not clinging to thoughts or ideas, allowing for a natural and spontaneous connection with the way. This all sounds good; the idea that in states of uncertainty, doubt, weakness, we have the ability to tap into a well of spiritual power. Yet in reality this is one of the hardest truths to accept.
Try telling an entrepreneur who is down to their last penny that they have entered a power position. Or explain to a cancer researcher who spent years testing their theory only to reach a dead end that hope for a cure is just around the corner. Reveal this truth to a person grieving a loss, a close of a chapter, an event that seemingly took them back to the start. Try telling them that they have limitless potential and see how they respond.
When I read these spiritual concepts, I can’t help but apply realistic scenarios and wonder how true they really are. Could a beginner’s mind really be an asset? Is weakness really just immeasurable power in disguise? As simple as these faiths make it sound, in practice these lessons are much more difficult to grasp. However, that doesn’t make them any less true.
Take the scenarios I imagined above. They are not too far fetched, in fact they are situations people find themselves in everyday. Maybe it’s not as dramatic as clinging to your last dollar, coming to a fruitless end to your research, or being completely lost in life. Yet many of us are struggling financially, work tireless on things that end up being pointless, or find ourselves confused with no clue what to do next. Chances are that all of us fall in at least one of these categories at this very moment. And if the beginner’s mind is a practice that can make things a little easier, how can we tap into its potential?
I’ll start with my own life. I am that clueless entrepreneur. Ahead of me is a mountain of to-do lists, unanswered questions, risks, and despite my best efforts to accept the beginner’s mindset, I would trade it all for a taste of success. There in lies the problem. It is not the beginner’s mind that is holding me back but myself. Let’s say I succeed, what then? Up until that point my sole focus has been on that moment. Not on the process, not on the things I could have learned on the journey, but on the destination. The brief moment that’s wonderous nature is only matched by its brevity. You see, what happens when we fail to realize the value of the beginner’s mind is we lose out on all its benefits. It is the beginning of the path that holds infinite potential, not the end.
The same is true even in a more grave situation like researching a deadly disease. It must be exhausting, both financially, mentally, and physically for institutions, researchers, and patients to walk up the road only to trek back to the start. Yet within all of that perceived failure, something miraculous has happened. The beginning has moved. Although there is still no cure for cancer, not one bit of research has gone to waste. With every attempt to discover a cure, the starting line moves higher and higher up the mountain. Starting again has yielded better diagnosis, improved treatment, and perhaps most exciting of all, better prevention. This is only made possible through the beginner’s mind. A promise to always keep learning, to keep pushing forward no matter the results.
Accepting our weakness and ignorance certainly has its benefits. It can provide context of the potential possibilities that lie ahead, it can even move the path forward so others have less to traverse, but what about the person who has reached the end of the road? What happens when you hit rock bottom? Scientist have learned that the deepest part of the ocean yields around 1,100 times the pressure of sea level. So if we find ourselves miles behind the starting line, with pressure compounding seemingly by the second, how do we accept our weakened state and move forward?
I don’t know.
Anticlimactic, I know. Perhaps we’ll never know. However, what I do know is you cannot know the beginning of anything until we understand the end. And the end for all living beings is death. The end of life, the end of a relationship, the end of reality as you know it. It is these moments in life that give us a glimpse of what is awaiting all of us. Hitting rock bottom offers a taste of the end, reminding us that life isn’t about the things that brought us to exceptional heights nor the devasting lows. Life is living and dying. Everything else is up to us.